I swear Jessica Simpson is reading the Retail Junkie. Did I just tell her to lay off the sunbeds or what? Okay Jess my next piece of crucial advice is brush your damn hair. How are you going to hook up with Jake Gyllenhaal et al with that Britneyesque mop ha ha?
Well if the acting career doesn't work out you can always turn to tree felling to pay for Gucci handbags.